National Cemetery Administration News--Burying Mother Against Her Wishes and Calling it Dignity

 National Cemetery Administration News--The Tale of Mother's Ashes

The Veterans Administration has not been helpful.

Infact, they have been confusing and it appears that they are going out of their way to absolve themselves of any responsibility--even though they did it.

Admire their idea to bury veterans so that someone who is in a precarious situation may have a final placement with dignity after serving their country--this is so lovely.

My mother does not fall into this category and the policies they they keep repeating to me with all the emotions of a robot just do not apply.

They say they care but after several weeks of dealing with them and trying to understand their conflicting statements one could come to the conclusion that the only ones they really care about are themselves.

My mother is the veteran, served her country proudly in the WAVES and had an advanced health care directive in place and named me in her trust as Next Of Kin and the one designated to handle her affairs.

She wsa so proud of the fact that she had everything in order--her cremation at Neptune and owning her plot at Greenwood in San Diego next to her parents and her brothers.

Scott does not listen...

We both had moved from SD after living there forever.  Visiting San Diego, Scott offered to pick up the ashes for me from Neptune.  Agreeing to this idea since it saved me from making a big trip.

Mother passed at the heigth of COVID and funerals and burials were shut down.  We had often discussed her burial at Greenwood next to his father and her parents.

We agreed to meet in San Diego in November but I had to cancel due to expense and circumstances.  Greenwood was raising their price to 3000 dollars from 2 thousand in the span of 6 months.  Car rental and gas were at an all-time high.

What was a day drive for Scott was turning into a 5,000 dollar trip for me that I just could not afford at the time.

Apologizing for not being able to make the trip and canceling one could sense a note of anger in the conversation.

Time was never a concern and one should have asked for the ashes to be mailed in retrospect.

In anger and revenge Scott placed mother's ashes at Prescott National Cemetery without my knowledge.

Calling Scott again to apologize for canceling he would not answer my call or text.

I'll let him cool off for a while.

Scott made flase statements to the National Cemetery Administration:

Full well knowing there was an advanced health care directive, full well knowing I am the Next of Kin and with a history of 16 phone calls within the past year, Scott claimed to the VA I did not exist and he had no idea in the world how to get in touch with me.

This was 4 months after we had last spoken and he had sent me the Human Remains form to send to Greenwood.

So now the National Cemetery Administration has all of this information.  They should be interested in helping me correct this situation.  They should care.  They should be partially responsible for the fact that they buried mother on false pretenses against her wishes.

The facts are there.  The way to correct this mistake is difficult and expensive.....and very hard for me to figure out--I am not a lawyer.

Let them act interested and treat this very wonderful Veteran with dignity.